We Are All Vampires

THE STUPID OR THICK VAMPIRE is the sixteenth chapter in the book, We Are All Vampires.

We Are All Vampires by Rute Serafim & Karl Swainston

We are all vampires, but some of us are more vampires than others. We’re not talking about the blood-curdle-drinking vampires of the past.; no, the modern vampire is more sophisticated and is everywhere in society, seeking only the energy of another person. This contemporary and contemptuous creature will be a husband, a wife, a partner, or a boss in the workplace, daily draining their victims of life.

CHAPTER 16 - THE STUPID OR THICK VAMPIRE by Rute Serafim & Karl Swainston

Stupid or Thick Vampire

The Stupid or Thick Vampire

This really is an unfortunate vampire. As the saying goes, this vampire is as ‘thick as a brick’. It does not possess the intelligence to operate as a successful vampire but is a vampire. Like the ugly and obnoxious vampire, the thick or stupid vampire is a regular tenant of Her Majesty’s Prisons. Although the stupid vampire is thick, it can also be as aggressive and violent as the ugly vampire.

The thick vampire has the yearning and the desire to suck out the positive energy from others. Although the thick vampire may not be ugly, it does not possess the mental faculties that allow it to vamporise successfully. This is when they have a tendency to lash out.

The stupid vampire will return to prison time and time again, committing the same crime almost with clockwork regularity. Unlike the ugly vampire, the stupid vampire is inclined to drugs, and when it is not in prison for some crime, the stupid vampire is off its face somewhere. This is why the thick vampire can also be known as the ‘druggie vampire.’

The stupid vampire has just about enough intelligence to recognise that it does not possess the mental faculties to operate as a successful vampire: it gave up on that back in childhood.

Throughout childhood and early teens, the thick vampire would almost certainly have been known to the social services. It would have regularly been in trouble in school and in society. Parents would have finally given up on the thick vampire in its teens, deeming the whole upbringing process a complete waste of time.

Once the parents had given up on the stupid vampire, it would begin life alone in its late teens, moving from hostel to prison, back to the hostel, and back to prison. Then a new life starts for the thick vampire in a bedsit, kindly arranged by the parole board.

For its remaining days on earth, the thick vampire will continually commit a crime, take drugs, go to prison, commit a crime again and retake drugs. If the thick vampire possesses any courage, it could consider suicide. Still, vampires are spineless creatures, and the thick vampire often leaves life through a drug overdose or from some interminable disease brought on by its unfortunate lifestyle.

The thick vampire is a genuinely tragic creature. Its tiny brain didn’t give the vampire a chance in life. But we must not feel sorry for this vampire. This vampire brings misery to many people because of its criminal activities. No amount of remedial therapy can help the stupid vampire. Like all the other vampires, the stupid vampire possesses no empathy, sympathy, or conscience to connect to and change the thick vampire’s ways.